Fiber bars, strewn along the side of the road. There had to be at least a dozen of them, still in their wrappers and completely unopened. No box in sight.
That's about the reaction my younger sister and I had when we stumbled on them on our early morning run. Really? along with disgusted sighs about the wastefulness of it. These were the expensive ones, not a generic store brand that kind of tastes and kind of looks the same sometimes.
So, when we weren't keeping an eye out for their box, we speculated about what had happened. And wondered how many more we were going to see before the end of our run.
"Maybe they took one bite and thought they were gross," my sister said. "So they threw them out because they didn't want them anymore."
I let out one of those disgusted sighs and nodded along with her theory. "Yeah, or they got in a huge fight, and threw them out in a fit of rage."
"That's a possibility."
And so the conversation went, when we had the breath to to converse. The ideas were fun, and spun further and further out, but we were no closer to determining what had happened or why when we reached my driveway. The intent, the purpose behind throwing twenty fiber bars (yeah, we counted during our cool down) out along the side of the road was simply beyond our grasp. We didn't know who to ask, either, so our speculation had to come to a standstill eventually for one simple reason.
We were never going to know.
One of the things I realized was how often I do the speculating thing. Something small happens in my life, and I want to know the purpose for it, the plan it is a part of, right away. I spend hours, days, even weeks trying to puzzle the event out. My family and friends probably get sick of how often it comes up in conversations when I'm in hashing mode. I can't seem to help myself, though. Writer's habit, I tell myself, like assigning blame elsewhere is getting to the root of an increasingly large problem.
Some self-reflection is a good and healthy thing. I know that. I just take it to unhealthy levels.
"Desist, and know that I am God..."+
The God who sees and hears and knows all of what has happened and what will happen. The One who knows the purpose of it all. He knows.
"Be still, and know that I am God..."*
While I'm adjusting my thought patterns, this verse calms the urge. He's a writer, and He knows the bigger picture. The bigger purpose of fiber bars along the side of the road, and of the things that happen in my life.
+ - Psalm 46:10, Young Literal Translation
* - also Psalm 46:10, New International Version
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